Pea Soup and Yoga

Two rules to live by:  Don’t drink and drive & Don’t eat pea soup and go to yoga class.

In all seriousness, drinking and driving is deadly.  Eating pea soup and going to a yoga class a few hours later is deadly embarrassing.

It all starts with a frozen ham bone.  I love to make the baked Jambon.  My friends who worship my old school ham dinner even have a song they sing when they get the invite.  I digress. That is another story – but don’t fret, it’s on the way.

Every time I cook a ham, I freeze the bone with a good portion of meat on it.  I put it in the fridge freezer, not the big chest freezer, because stuff like bones just get lost in there.  I want that pig’s leg looking at me every time I open the freezer door, saying “Seriously!  Just make the pea soup already!”  That last bone trash-talked me for months until I finally broke down.

You need to take your time simmering this soup so the peas break down.  More than once (and I should have learned my lesson), I’ve gotten so horny to be done that I pulled it off the heat too soon.  Inevitably, I end up pureeing it in the blender or cuisinart before the peas are totally cooked.

Understand, what I’ve just made by not cooking it long enough is fuel for methane.  This is where the yoga comes in.  I have a bowl for lunch then catch a 3:30 Hatha class at Semperviva.

It’s all good until we do this stretching pose:


A sound came out of my bottom that was like a stacato note from a trumpet.  Loud, high pitched and abrupt.  I’m really into my practice (as they say) at this moment, so it doesn’t really faze me.  Plus I’m in the front corner and I’m hoping the echo off the wall disguises where the sound came from.  Really, the only people who know who dealt it are the dude beside me and the girl behind me.  I play it cool and continue like nothing happened.  Then we do this pose:


It’s called “Happy Baby.”  Now I’m getting nervous.  This is a stretch where you’re supposed to relax.  All I’m thinking now is: Please don’t let it go off again.  If I don’t get out of this pose, this Happy Baby is going to fill his diaper.  Needless to say, the rest of the class was a challenge trying to stretch, relax and clench all at the same time.  Here’s the recipe.  Enjoy it after yoga, not before.

1 400g pkg dried yellow split peas
1 ham bone w/ some meat
4 tbsp olive oil
1-1/2 cups yellow onion, finely chopped
1 cup celery, finely chopped
1 cup carrots, finely chopped
4 garlic cloves, minced
5 cups chicken broth
5 cups water
2 bay leafs
2 sprigs fresh thyme
3 tbsp curry powder
3 tbsp brown sugar
salt & pepper to taste
1 Place peas in large bowl and rinse thoroughly with water.  Cover 
with water by a few inches & soak overnight in refrigerator.
2 Drain peas.
3 In a large stock pot, heat olive oil.  Add onions & cook 3 minutes. 
Add celery & carrots.  Cook 3 minutes more.  Add garlic & cook 
2 minutes more.  Add water, chicken broth, bay leaves, thyme & bone.
Bring to a boil, then simmer 1 hour.
4 Remove bay leaves, thyme twigs & bone.
5 Add drained peas, curry & brown sugar.  Bring to a boil, then simmer,
stirring occasionally, until peas are tender, approx. 1-1/2 hours.
(Add a little water if soup becomes too thick).
6 Add salt & pepper to taste.
7 Let cool 1/2 hour.
8 Purree in blender or cuisinart.  Reheat & serve.

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Categories: Food, Recipes

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4 Comments on “Pea Soup and Yoga”

  1. March 29, 2008 at 1:32 am #

    how refreshing to read through your articles, getting more and more excited to see Jer share with the world his list of talents, then I come to read this article and can’t stop laughing as I have this image of you in a black leotard with a tooting butt in the downward dog … who would of thought pea soup and yoga would crack me up so hard =)

  2. April 1, 2008 at 4:27 pm #

    Ahhhh….now that was a good laugh. You should have your own show. I started laughing and it just kept coming in waves. Much like the waves of joy you felt in yoga class. A similar thing happened to me at the Bikrams studio on Cambie. I thought they were going to call the cops. I dunno, what with the pube covered, sweat soaked, vile carpet and the disgusting lighting they insist on, coupled with the irritating white chick yelling at me in faux Indian, I think I added some class to the joint with my addition.

  3. April 2, 2008 at 9:20 pm #


    i’ve been there myself. most recently it was a pilates class — what do they expect to happen when you tighten up the mid-section and contract thus leaving no room for all that air?

  4. August 28, 2008 at 3:07 am #

    I ended up here while searching the net Why? Beats me ask the search engine but anyhow it was a nice surprise I enjoyed discovering your blog, thx for the nice read!

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